Always Forever
by Javelin the Silent One
Summary: Meryl's falling, and it scares her. Vash can't stop her from falling, but can he hold her hand and come down with her? Or has he already?


Disclaimer: If I owned Trigun, there would be insert random couple and cliché romantic/sexual action here in every episode! Wheet-whoo for satire! Also don't own "I Love You Always Forever" by Donna Lewis. Not that I like the song so much, but that it describes Vash.

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Wheet-whoo! Hullo hullo! 

Yes, it's me, and I am hyper. Well, sort of. Not really. Just super energetic.

At any rate, I guess the reason I'm feeling so alive is because of all the anime I rented from Instant Replay. I also rented my first DVD of Trigun. Just—just wow. This is perhaps one of the most amazing animes I have ever seen. In fact, I went ahead and spoiled the whole series for myself because I was so eager to see what would happen! And I have to say, they all look just as lovely, if not lovelier, than the first four eppies.

At any rate, Vash is my favorite character. He scares my best friend, I think, but he just appears as a really beautiful person to me. I find myself at a weakness for sweet, innocent characters, and Vash just seems to fit the bill perfectly! Granted, he may seem like a lecher, but come ON, if you were assumed to be a horrible killer and were cut off from civilization for, oh say, 131 frickin years, wouldn't you be a little perverted too?…never mind. Don't answer that. Anyway, I love him, and I love the Vash/Meryl relationship. I don't know why.

So enjoy my pointless fluff. Remember, FLUFF HEALS THE SOUL!

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Summary: Midnight stars and passion can unchain the words of the soul and harness emotions that would otherwise remain dormant. Meryl is discovering this for the first time during her realization; she loves him, and is falling for him…and she can't stop. But she'll fall…and bring Vash with her. VxM. 

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Suggestive scene in the beginning…maybe some other stuff.

Notes: No particular spoilers, I think…nope, just pointless, soul-healing fluff.

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_**Always Forever**_

By Half-Light

Her body ached in the slow throb of desire as his breathing evened out and he dropped off, his arm around her…but it was a good ache, she decided. It made her feel warmed…loved.

_Feels like, I'm standing in a timeless dream_

_Of light mists, of pale amber rose_

Disentangling herself from his smooth, hot arms, she took the comforter and drew it around her shoulders, walked out into the moonlight, the pale moon and sky and stars opened up to her it seemed in a warm embrace.

She welcomed it like a child with a skinned knee welcomed the gentle touch of a mother's lips across the wound, healing it and making it feel whole, even though it was still there and would never really fade.

_Feels like, I'm lost in a deep cloud of heavenly scent_

_Touching, discovering you_

She closed her eyes halfway at the sound of his breathing, his exhalation carrying a note of his tone, innocent, caring, loving. His scent came back to her, his warmth, his hands.

God, she thinks, looking over the sleeping city. Did I do right, Ma? Did I do wrong? Was it right for me to….

She shoved the thought out. No, not yet. She had to have time to think…before she came to that action.

_Those days, of warm rains come rushing back to me_

_Miles of windless, summer air_

Right now, she tries to shove his smell out of her mind…but it doesn't work. It only brings back more memories. Memories of when she was younger, running through the corn after a rain.

It was funny, really. Nothing about her appearance spoke "farm girl"…but it was there, in her blood, in the way she acted. Chasing after him, finally catching him in heated kisses that turned into—

Corn, she thinks. Like corn after a moist rain, running through the stalks, accumulating humidity and dirt on her overalls, dinner would come soon but for now all she needed was this, just the heat and smell of dampening rain.

She realizes how much shelonged for home…and how much his arms had seemed like it.

_Secret moments, shared in the heat of the afternoon_

_Out of the stillness, soft spoken words_

Look up to the sky, the twinkling and winking stars, filled with the immortal light of space and the promise that morning would come. But now…now that light seemed borrowed. Borrowed from…those eyes.

The action had seems muffled, still blurry in her mind, it was hard to believe they did…that. That, with someone supposedly wanted for sixty-billion double dollars. But she remembers the eyes, how they had lit up at her touch…and she knows they had.

It was hard to forget those eyes.

_I love you, always forever_

_Near and far, closer together_

_Everywhere, I will be with you_

_Everyday, I will devour you_

Something eats at her. But it is an unfamiliar emotion, and she hugs herself. It's not anger, anger is white-hot on her tongue. It's not sadness, no, bringing him such joy had made her feel more alive than ever, made her nerves light up in a way she never thought possible.

So then what was this…?

_I love you, always forever_

_Near and far, closer together_

_Everywhere, I will be with you_

_Everywhere, I will devour you_

Then she hits upon it.

Regret.

That's what she feels.

_You've got, the most incredible _

_Blue eyes I've ever seen_

She turns back to him, his eyes are still closed, the lamp is hidden under the table, like that story in the Bible. Funny. She had gone to church when she was younger, had recited the Nicene Creed and taken the body and blood of the Lamb—but the emotions always felt empty, lonely. She hadn't felt saved, she felt abandoned.

And then she had met him….

_You've got, me almost melt away_

_As we lay there, under a blue sky_

Reflecting on it, if there is a God, and he had a son named Jesus…heaven forgive her, she thinks, but this man would be like him. Innocent, proclaimed a heretic and killer, a man who would raise the dead if he could and god, he was such a joy and a miracle worker.

All she is is a Mary Magdelene.

She had been drunk, earlier that evening…drunk, and terribly sad. She'd remembered him walking up to her, looking her in the eyes, her crying eyes…seeing how broken she was.

And he'd reached out a hand, gently caressed her face before crushing his trembling lips against hers.

_With pure white stars_

_Exotic sweetness a magical time_

The act afterwards had been murky, but was now clearing up.

They had made love, pure and simple, else she wouldn't need a comforter to clothe her body. And the sorrow wasn't for herself. A tear made its way down her face as she thought of him.

What right had she to defile such a pure, sweet, innocent being like that…for her own satiation, to comfort herself?

_I love you, always forever_

_Near and far, closer together_

_Everywhere, I will be with you_

_Everyday, I will devour you_

She hears someone shifting, hears cold feet padding on the floor. She simply shuts her eyes so tight it hurts…hoping he'll just leave her, her imperfection and her unworthiness, recognize her for the filth she is.

She doesn't deserve him…not a menopausal-seeming, bitchy insurance agent.

At least that's what she tells herself.

_I love you, always forever_

_Near and far, closer together_

_Everywhere, I will be with you_

_Everyday, I will devour you_

Instead they come closer, and she trembles, trying to stop her tears as his warm arms, scarred with injuries past, slide around her shoulders.

"Mer…you're shaking."

"….."

"I'll stay here…but only if you want me to. If it hurts…just push me away. I'll understand." His voice is warm and caring as he repeats almost exactly what he said nearly thirty minutes before…and just like before, it carries a tenderness, except this time it doesn't carry the urgency of want.

"…Why…?"

_Say you'll love, love me forever_

_Never stop, never whatever_

_Near and far and always and_

_Everywhere, and everything_

"Why what?" he murmurs, and she feels him playfully bite her ear. She reaches up and grabs his arm, digging her nails into it.

"I…I'm not worthy…worthy of your love…!" Tears choke her voice. "I love you so much, you're so beautiful it hurts me, but—" In disgust and anger, she flings off the comforter and turns towards him. "Vash, LOOK at me, for God's sake!

All she hears is a little chuckle as he places a hand on the small of her back, pulling her close.

_Say you'll love, love me forever_

_Never stop, never whatever_

_Near and far and always and _

_Everywhere and everything_

"I'm looking," he said, and she's looking into his eyes and oh, god, his eyes are so beautiful, and his hair is slumping down into his face…the way it should really look. But he's still so pure…even with all the scars she sees. "I really do like—no, I LOVE—what I see. And…well, you should know how hard it is for me to say that I love someone, what with all the woman…."

She tries to shove away violently, sensing him pulling her towards him, her head in the crook of his neck, his hand playing idly with his hair. She finally gives up and slumps against him, her tears making his shoulder wet.

"I'm so…imperfect." She says finally. "I'm bitchy, whiny, and…and…."

He silences her with a kiss.

_Say you'll love, love me forever_

_Never stop, never whatever_

_Near and far and always and _

_Everywhere and everything_

Their lips part, his eyes smile into hers. He says one last thing.

"Look at me. Merlyn, I love your imperfections…each and every little one."

Their lips touch again and how can she resist? He smells like corn after the rains, with just a touch of vanilla.

And her pretenses fall away underneath the midnight sky as he guides her back to the bed…not for love, but for sleep. He knows she is tired. And he knows that she must sleep…she must sleep, to be awakened by the kiss of a prince and be forever changed.

And he will look for that girl in the morning, and she promises she will be there.

_I love you, always forever_

_Near and far, closer together_

_Everywhere, I will be with you_

_Everyday, I will devour you_

"D-don't…don't l…leave me…." She sighs between kisses. She feels a smile on his lips as he responds.

"I won't let you go, Mer."

_I love you, always forever_

_Near and far, closer together_

Darkness, delicious darkness descends around her, except without the foreboding of before. And she welcomes that darkness, this heat welling up inside of her.

And she feels the sheets pulling up around them. She knows that the sun will find them like this tomorrow, exhausted.

And, for once in her life, she doesn't mind.

_Everywhere, I will be with you_

After all, what's the rush…?

_Everywhere, I will devour you_

The stars twinkled with intensity rivaled by Vash's eyes.

_I love you, always forever...

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Wheet whoo…that was sweet. I'm very, VERY proud of this…and I guess that's saying something, especially about fluff. Because, as some of my loyal readers know, I am NOT a fluffy happy…okay, never mind. But most of my stories delve into the human psyche…of searching within themselves and recovering themselves with the help of someone…

Now that I think about it, this story isn't much different, I guess.

….Shut up.

If you want this to be an ongoing story, drop me a review, please. I have an idea for a second chapter, maybe from Vash's view, to a certain song by Vanessa Carlton. Meeh…we'll see.

Love and Peace 4eva,

Half-Light


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